Capri, Florence or Rome for some off-season Italian swagger. Sweden or Denmark for a touch of Scandi chic, perhaps.
Or maybe a splash of sunshine in South Africa or far-flung adventure in Vietnam. Where you go on holiday can say a lot about who you are as a person.
Which brings us to Keir Starmer and his choice of Madeira.
The remote Portuguese island in the Atlantic has plenty of charm but it doesn’t exactly set the holiday pulse racing. The PM’s holiday pick might just tell us something we deep down already know: he is, perhaps, a little dull.
Here, we take a look at what your choice of holiday destination reveals about your personality.
CORNWALL
WHO GOES THERE: David Cameron, Gordon Ramsay
Gordon Ramsay poses with his bike at his £4million Cornish home
You like to think yourself down-to-earth, and carry about the salty whiff of rock pools. But you’re actually – dare we say? – a bit of snob, since the idea of a holiday in the Med with guaranteed sunshine is a bit, well outre for the summer. Yet behind all the fine, back-to-basics idealism there’s probably a nanny in tow, and you’re renting an architect-designed holiday home (with hot-tub) that costs far more than a Jet2 package to the Costa del Sol – or you own a multi-million pound beachfront mansion.
BALI
WHO GOES THERE: Brad Pitt, Mick Jagger, Nicole Kidman, Cameron Diaz, Taylor Swift
You have a wardrobe full of flowing, unstructured linen and talk about yourself in the third person (free spirit, social butterfly, inner goddess – you get the picture).
That’s why you choose Bali – you know it will be ‘life-changing’. And even if it isn’t, you’re not going to tell anyone otherwise.
You love to be pampered but dress it up with new age justification – clinking your crystals and unfurling your yoga mat at any opportunity to release the healing vibes. Your idea of heaven is mojitos at sunset. And, in the bleak reality of a UK winter, you can be found playing tropical house beats to lift your mood.
Or having a coconut water and berry smoothie at your desk.
ABERSOCH, NORTH WALES
WHO GOES THERE: Wayne and Coleen Rooney, Kyle Walker and on/off wife
Badged Cheshire-on-sea, you’re drawn to this smart corner of the Llyn Peninsula because you love the salty slap of your husband’s wetsuit and a dose of rustic scenery.
You like communality – albeit in the form of a deluxe static campsite, complete with spa and a car park full of Range Rovers – and sitting on the balcony of your smart caravan, in denim shorts and expensive fleece, watching your kids (one called Infinity) master paddleboarding.
SWISS ALPS IN SUMMER
WHO GOES THERE: Theresa May
Theresa May walks in a forest with her husband Philip on a summer holiday in the Alps
Breathtaking Alpine landscapes, sparkling lakes, clean air… you appreciate peace and a connection with nature.
You don’t need sophisticated entertainment. You’re team Theresa when it comes to naughtiness – running or marching in long scratchy socks through the nearest field. On the other hand, you value punctuality, efficiency and cleanliness (you probably keep your map in a plastic folder).
TUSCANY
WHO GOES THERE: Gwyneth Paltrow, Julia Roberts
You’re cool and complicated. So you relish a holiday where you can idle in a rented farmhouse sipping Chianti and enjoying the view. That’s because you see yourself as a deep thinker and like to record nuggets of brilliant observation in a notebook you bought at WHSmith in Gatwick.
You have a selection of sunrise yoga apps, and kid yourself that one day you’ll come back to write your novel here.
MALDIVES
WHO GOES THERE: Paris Hilton, Cristiano Ronaldo
Paris Hilton relaxes by the ocean on a trip to the Maldives
You’re a dreamer – one who believes that paradise has to be seen to be enjoyed.
You want nothing more than to relax in your own tanned skin, oversized sunglasses on your nose and always within reaching distance of the latest Jodi Picoult.
Yet truthfully, you don’t want to be that detached from the world since all those snow-white beaches rack up lots of likes on Instagram.
DUBAI
WHO GOES THERE: Justin Bieber, Demi Lovato
You’ve worked hard for your money and you want sunshine, high energy, and a place to enjoy the spangly designer bikini procured in the fag-end of the Selfridges sale. You aren’t fussed about authenticity – given all that imported sand is as fake as a WAG’s embonpoint.
MIAMI
WHO GOES THERE: Beyonce, Madonna, Tom Cruise
Crank up the volume, because you are someone who wants all five senses to feel utterly alive.
Most likely you keep a stock of tinned, ready blended cocktails in the house. You love – love! –bling, drama, noise and indulge your inner celebrity by wearing sunglasses even when the weather is lousy and you’re only going to Sainsburys.
Life, you tell anyone who’ll listen, is for living.
SCOTTISH HIGHLANDS
WHO GOES THERE: Kate Winslet, Richard Branson
Ever since Paul McCartney retreated to the Mull of Kintyre after the Beatles broke up, the Highlands have drawn you in as a place to retreat and recharge. You don’t mind a damp red nose or drizzle-frizzy hair – an antidote to the social mores and sartorial restrictions of your real life. It’s a dream to shake off commercialism, connect with yourself and disconnect from WhatsApp.
SOUTH OF FRANCE
WHO GOES THERE: Brooklyn Beckham, Kate Moss, Leonardo DiCaprio
Kate Moss enjoys an ice cream while on holiday in Saint-Paul-de-Vence, near Nice
Although you want a beach break, you’re a cut above the average sun-seeker. Dodging the lobster pink Brits in Torremolinos for a place where you can dawdle around petite villages, before returning to your charming but poorly air-conditioned rural holiday rental to prepare baguettes and wheels of mozzarella by the pool. You love to go native, dusting down sixth-form French to try to align with the locals.
ROME
WHO GOES THERE: George and Amal Clooney, Tom Hanks, and Julia Roberts
Busy, busy, busy: you fly from work meetings to gym, from parents’ evening to book club. Then complain there isn’t enough time in the day, before squashing in a super quick drink with the girls from Pilates.
But it’s fine because you’re a monster if you’re doing nothing, so you pick a city break like Rome. You’re a skilled negotiator, offering bribes of ice cream/pizza to sulky members of your party so you can see the Colosseum for real.
AND FINALLY… MADEIRA
WHO GOES THERE: Keir Starmer
It’s so easy for you to book a trip to Madeira, since you’ve done it before. Many times.
Frankly you’re not the adventurous type. Since there’s not that much to see or do. Keir Starmer’s naughty queue jumping for the toboggan ride was the most exciting thing to have happened in Madeira in years.
But that doesn’t bother you – you celebrate routine, embrace the dull reassurance of a return trip to the same hotel year after year.
