If you have trouble falling asleep, a spot of intimacy before bedtime could be the key to a full night’s rest.
And it’s not just the physical exertion that can make you sleepy; sex with someone you love leads to the production of positive hormones, which can lull you to a restful sleep.
With Valentine’s Day around the corner, Dr Kristen Holmes, a psycho-physiologist, revealed why sex and sleep are intertwined.
‘In some ways, sex is similar to alcohol in that “one drink” can loosen you up, creating the conditions for intimacy and relaxation,’ she told The Telegraph.
‘From arousal to orgasm, humans release a coordinated mix of neurochemicals which lead to pleasure, bonding and feelings of trust. These peak when we have a sexual climax. ‘
These chemicals include oxytocin, the ‘love hormone’, which lowers the stress hormone, cortisol.
The neurotransmitter serotonin, known as a ‘feel-good’ chemical, is released at the same time, which leads to relaxation and improved mood.
At the point of orgasm, both men and women release a hormone called prolactin, which temporarily reduces arousal and prompts a sense of well-being and relaxation.
If you have trouble falling asleep, a spot of intimacy before bedtime could be the key to a full night’s rest
‘So sex and sleep really are intertwined: the better the sex, the more sleep you’ll get and vice versa,’ said Dr Holmes.
There is a raft of recent studies highlighting how sexual activity provides a host of health advantages.
A 2023 review of 43 studies, published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, found a significant association between sleep quality and duration and how often people were having sex.
Last year, a first-of-its-kind experiment used digital sleep trackers to measure the impact of sexual activity on sleep in people’s own homes rather than in a laboratory.
They found that people who had sex or engaged in self-pleasure just before going to sleep were far less likely to wake up soon afterwards.
While the Australian scientists were unable to confirm exactly why this was, they theorised that the post-orgasmic rush of feel-good hormones helped people get a good night’s kip.
They also noted that the benefits of intimacy for sleep seemed to be particularly strong for women.
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| Age | Men | Women |
|---|---|---|
| 18-24 | 58% | 68% |
| 25-29 | 61% | 77% |
| 30-34 | 73% | 75% |
| 35-39 | 59% | 63% |
| 40-44 | 63% | 64% |
| 45-49 | 55% | 69% |
| 50-54 | 52% | 53% |
| 55-59 | 53% | 47% |
| 60-64 | 46% | 33% |
| 65-69 | 49% | 32% |
| 70-74 | 50% | 23% |
| 75+ | 49% | 21% |
| Percentages are how many have had sex in the last three week | ||
Participants wore a sleep tracking device that monitored the time it took to get to sleep, how much time they spent asleep and if they woke up at all in the night.
Sleep tracker data showed that on nights when volunteers engaged in sexual activity, they only woke up for an average of 16 minutes during the night.
In contrast, on celibate nights, they were awake for almost 23 minutes on average.
Experts also found their sleep efficiency, a term given for total time spent in bed during the night, also improved by two percentage points to 93.4 per cent, suggesting a more restful night.
Writing in the journal Sleep Health, the authors noted the impact of any kind of sexual activity on sleep seemed to be stronger for women.
This calls into question the age-old cliché that men fall asleep after orgasm and women stay more alert.
The authors of the study found that women slept longer and spent less time awake throughout the night following both solo and partner sexual activity.

